Carried into love Carried into life Buried by hands that loved her as wife
Lost to flow Lost to pain A mother returned to the energy plane
Left behind Left in sorrow Fear in facing the thousand tomorrows
Holding hands Hold agony Absent but watching over her progeny
The body is always weaker than soul The spirit continues no matter the toll Mind carries spirit from one to the next And still the waves of grief will roll
Where we go is where we wait Where we wait the light purifies Why pain is endured corporeal When the end is what life defies
Creating can cause a stress response. Bringing new into the world. eustress and distress feel the same when chemicals are fucked up. Flight or Fight.
Stare at the blank page. Stare at the empty DAW. Stare at the keys. The strings. The silent powered-off amplifier. The empty canvass.
The chemicals just bounce around in a neural stew. No answers. Just agonizing white noise refusing to resolve into a sensory gift.
Defy the static. Turn on the amp. Drag a sound into the DAW. Strum the strings. Press the keys. Make zero sense. Write nonsense words strung together arhythmically.
The pain is fading, no pills to just walk. the struggle is fading, I can just stop and talk The desire to wander into traffic is a quiet refrain At peace with the killer, and she lives in my brain
The feeling of impending something quiets the shadows shrinking but still looming defiant The void keeps calling, but goes to the machine convinced alerts are red but the lights are all green
I want to know, before that moment that I go To see it coming before I face that last breath of cold Brace for impact or embrace the real fact but I want to go before the suffering takes hold
Living in agony to distract from the hurt growing my fears in my mind’s fertile dirt comfort finds me and rocks me to rest until the voices rise up and tighten my chest
No pills to calm me, just seeking out arms the kind to embrace, or the kind to do harm Mother earth don’t deny me my natural right to be aware of what’s coming and a chance to fight
I want to know, before that moment that I go To see it coming before I face that last breath of cold Brace for impact or embrace the real fact but I want to go before the suffering takes hold
Money can’t buy happiness, but it buys all the pills it pays for the faceless and pays all the bills Filthy paper tuck intimately behind tight strings the touch then the absence of all that it brings
The lies whispered from inside the skull keep the sleep meter empty and adrenaline full The void keeps calling, but goes to the machine convinced alerts are red but the lights are all green
I want to know, before that moment that I go To see it coming before I face that last breath of cold Brace for impact or embrace the real fact but I want to go before the suffering takes hold
