I remember…
The veins of my roots coming through the dirt
I remember…
The stitches in my soul to repair the hurt
I remember…

I remember the man who has beaten me
Only blood we had was from calamity
But he was part of the stepfamily
Pain wasn’t all he was teaching me

I remember…
The veins of my roots coming through the dirt
I remember…
The stitches in my soul to repair the hurt
I remember…

She had eyes the size of the world it seems
with a heart that was broken like her dreams
caught up in a torrent when she swims the streams
pale blue eyes whose tears can’t redeem

I remember
The veins of my roots coming through the soil
I remember
The rage in the blood that would make it boil
I remember
The agony I had to share so they’d recoil
I remember

Runaway, now the details do not matter
Be the same on another plain in another time
The path of destruction has tributaries
and the agony of survival is sublime

I remember…
The veins of my roots coming through the dirt
I remember…
The stitches in my soul to repair the hurt
I remember…

I can run forever

One breath
The pain is gone
Doubt disappears
Nothing is wrong

I can run forever

To live
We first must die
One clean Stab
We open the eye

I can see forever

Alive
No rules apply
Fire-powered machine
And the world will fry

I will live forever

In time
My brothers arrive
Whispering to me
That the plan goes live

I have lost forever

Bleeding out
The lights turn off
Slipping to abyss
With Kalashnikov

I am the never

…

But I remember the shadow people
I remember the shadow people
I remember the shadow people
I remember the shadow people

I can live forever

They speak
Whisper to me
Another little touch
A can be

I will burn forever

Ride edges
They call to me
Planning my demise
I need to see

Into the forever

But I remember the shadow people
I remember the shadow people
I remember the shadow people
I remember the shadow people

Constant companions
Do they die when I sleep
Do they walk when awake
must maintain for their sake

I remember the shadow people
I remember the shadow people
I remember the shadow people
I remember the shadow people

Your power can be increased through the faith of your followers. But they cannot be told this in the beginning. Only voluntary faith creates the connection between the faithful and the bright one.

Bright one must protect.
can start raising a plateau.

The dark ones feed and warp those they consume into twisted parodies of the souls they were in life.

The filth will come
the truth is now
can not be erased

Vile the hand
led by the head
that shined so bright before

Rotting away
the accolades
starved forever more

I want you to fall to me
warping ’till you break
nothing left but hell and fear
A taste of all your victim’s hate!

The bonds they hold
the web you wove
the husk you will leave

corrupt the beauty
you create
a hell so soft inside

another touch
another day
another left tossed aside

a broken one
a trusting one
Now it’s time to DIE

I want you to fall to me
warping ’till you break
nothing left but hell and fear
A taste of all your victim’s hate!

The pieces left
they linger on
reminding you of what was

How many lives
each are the knives
Cut the truth into your skin

Reality
the final cut
that brings you wide awake

all are gone
who sheltered you
and now the pain begins

I want you to fall to me
warping ’till you break
nothing left but hell and fear
A taste of all your victim’s hate!

The blending is taking the stark
making gray

                 Bold realizations become clouds

the static murmuring, burning bland
When all is heat, then hot has no reference
and cold burns

Interrupt driven

grinding the gears, pushing steam
hold this chaos, hold this mind
a misfire sparks a wildfire and bathes one in the instant glory that leaves ashes

But the come down
post orgasmic tremors

The gray takes over, and there is no set Medelbrot can create to break this constant shade that makes my shade crave escape again. 

Like the gray matters in the grey matter. 

Blend away

bend until they become the same

break away from this path and just have this moment as we embrace again the inner peace of gathered fragments that is the cranial chaos 

That was once our lives

Breath like fire and blood is ice. Skin has its own mind.
Crawling out of the throat is the truth, letting sanity unwind.

If we had it to do over again, I would turn reality to ashes.
Instead, we stare into the horrors as the second hand passes

What flesh is this that parts so easily?
Embrace the blade and open to the breeze
The river runs warm
The source begins to freeze

The moon rose again and blankets the earth in reflected grace,
She turned her face away, letting pinpoints watch in her place.

Cataclysmic mother once torn to birth the barren daughter.
cries out in agony for the scars that evolution has brought her.

Penetrated and burned for the blood of those who died before
She hopes their suffering will end, and she can cry no more.

What flesh is this that parts so easily?
Embrace the blade and open to the breeze
The river runs warm
The source begins to freeze

We crave to claim and walk again on another mother in the sky
Who’s only child mishapen can barely stand to fly

Captured over to witness metal insects crawl her skin
The cycle of her sister will one day start again

But these ashes will drift forever on the cosmic ice
Considered the path but did not consider twice

What flesh is this that parts so easily?
Embrace the blade and open to the breeze
The river runs warm
The source begins to freeze

Newly formed and lustrous
becoming a jewel from layers thrown
a broken threshold a flash
The lights in an instant are stole

both sides to the light
to be formed in the dark
to face layers and come out glowing

Destroyed in a moment
of ongoing torment
The running waters want to go not knowing

Another star blooms in tension
when the tether is cut
rising out of the horror we’re facing

the night folds around
and holds out the beauty
so we can see one last love embracing

And then I climb out and the lingering bits crust over and fall away, leaving itching reminders of where they were in my psyche.

But the lingering adhesions where the edges are… remind me that the attachment points are still there. That I am still wired to interface with the morass. The primeval shade of unspecified rage and bile wants to burn the edges.

A family full of black sheep looking for a herd.
MLM, Amway, or right-wing media.
Cults and Jesus freaks, they’re the encyclopedia.
Never found a story they couldn’t swallow.
A pyramid conspiracy that they wouldn’t follow.

Another opportunity. Another broken scam.
Another broken promise to take away the glam.
Spend money to make it, the hook is set.
Just like the last times but then they forget.

Another home, another hole, another school to skip.
Never had the tickets, so couldn’t miss the ship
It sailed so long ago, I was tangled in a placenta
So fuck the captains of the ship and the fuckers who sent ya

They call it envy when angry, but I just want to eat
want to stop all the noises
want to have warm, dry feet
no skills to express the trauma that is felt
So the answer is found at the end of a belt

It was swung at first, then found in the hand
The belt has kept swinging to meet the demand
that the child won’t be spoiled, and the rod is long gone
until it swings on the belt and the cycle has won

The box it is pretty, the crowd it is strange
another chapter is closed, another memory exchanged
Healing leaves tissue of random connections
Trauma leaves traces of hidden infections

Goodbye is something that never gets heard
by those who need to hear that one compound word
I am sorry for existence
But thanks for the ride
Loved you from biology
I forgive the lost pride
Forgive my transgression
and the spite for existence
I only stay above ground at the others’ insistence.

Carry gifts from the womb to the welcoming tomb
burn and distribute me to the corners of earth
or launch the ashes into space so the planet can birth
the wasted matter that was all but consumed
by the terrors of existing
and the widening wound.